FLASH BACK!
Shenanigans from July 2011!
played Lego Harry Potter
watched the first part of the year 7 movie
tested out our magic skills
and took a nap.
This was all before noon so it was a long wait until the movie.
10:30 pm Thursday July 14
Downtown
Great Escape Theater
We're definitely not the most clever witches of our age- because we thought by arriving at 10:30 we would be guaranteed a good spot in line. But upon arriving we found ourselves surrounded by the world of Hogwarts.
Once there we were divided into one of 4 theaters.
We were sorted into theater 5. . .we thought all was well as we took a seat in the second row from the front with the few SANE people in the theater.
Chicken: It's not like we had a choice. At 10:30 the theater was already full- at least the front three rows were pretty much empty.
Bo: I think we had the best seats in the house. . . the Hufflepuff wizard sitting next to us had the Sword of Gryffindor.
Once we had gotten settled with our popcorn and . . .oh sh*t!
Darth Vader & Luke Skywalker are having a light saber fight
in front of the screen!
Oh, wait, Harry Potter just broke up the fight.
Thank goodness.
(And no, we're not kidding.)
Chicken: Man, I need to start carrying my light saber with me.
Bo: I brought my wand. Accio Cherry Coke!
Then there was a lovely shadow puppet show featuring mostly rabbits and walking fingers provided by the crazies sitting the the back of the theater.
10:52
The shadow puppet people were stopped by the theater staff from continuing the show.
After the light saber battle and shadow puppet show, we decided we were sorted into the "most Slytherin house" of the movie theater.
Chicken: Yeah, cause we were surrounded by dumb a**es.
Bo: Which really stinks because I'm a Ravenclaw.
Chicken: And I'm a Gryffindor or a Ravenclaw. I'm not the sorting hat so I'm not going to pick sides without a proper sorting.
Sitting and waiting for the movie to start was like riding on the train to Hogwarts: stuffy, crowded, food littering the floor, and full of crazy witches & wizards.
It is now 11:10 and Chicken is close to loosing it.
We just discovered Draco sitting behind us and we are now concerned for the mudbloods and muggles in the audience.
Bo: I'm totally feeling out of the technological-loop because we are surrounded by people who are texting and tweeting. . .and all I can do is talk and type.
Costume Contest!
The winner was a gal who had the PERFECT Madame Trelawney outfit- complete with carpet bag and cup to read tea leaves. She announced to the audience after reading her tea leaves, "I see a man with a mustache which means. . .DEATH FOR EVERYONE!"
Bo isn't concerned.
Bo: I brought my wand.
Chicken. . . well
Chicken: I could only hope that prediction comes true.
11:29
Enter the trolley candy lady.
Chicken questions whether or not she can magically swipe her credit card with her wand.
The following is the ACTUAL conversation
of the teens sitting directly behind us. . .SERIOUSLY.
"What are the main points in the past 7 movies?"
"Wait. What?"
"You know, what are these movies about."
"Well, I guess it's mostly about trying to kill Voldemort."
"Okay. Hey did you get my tweet?"
"Is your name all lower case or are there some numbers in there?"
"No, it's all lower case- no numbers."
"In the name of all that is holy- did you see what (girl's name) has been wearing to gym?"
"I know, right."
"I wonder where this stuff all happened."
"What stuff?"
"The Harry Potter stuff. You know that no one just comes up with all of this stuff. It has to really happen in real life. There's no way she just came up with all of the stuff to write all these books. She saw it happen somewhere."
11:40
Chicken was hit by the Sword of Gryffindor-
she survived and there was much celebration and applause.
11:43
Three girls returned after getting popcorn and candy. . .there was much celebration and applause by the male muggles in the back of the theater.
Bo checked her phone for the um-teen-th time to see how much longer until the movie starts. . . 16 minutes and counting.
11:45
Chicken starts REALLY loosing it. She begins wondering if there will ever be a Harry Potter 7 Part 2.
She also starts plotting to steal the Sword of Gryffindor.
11:46
The Hufflepuff wizard with The Sword shows off his Elder wand. Chicken chickens out of stealing The Sword - Bo offers to lend her wand to Chicken. Chicken declines wand and states she will take things into her own hands.
11:47
Bo learns "Accio Sword of Gryffindor" doesn't work if you're a Ravenclaw- drat.
We also learn that there are only 13 minutes until the aforementioned Hufflepuff wizard's childhood ends.
Audience members start randomly clapping.
11:49
Our Hufflepuff neighbor tests out his sword skills. . . not bad.
10 minutes until the end of the the Hufflepuff wizard's childhood.
Chicken: Okay, I think the professor's prediction (from the costume contest) will come true.
11:53
7 minutes until the end of the the Hufflepuff wizard's childhood.
Chicken: 7 minutes until I end the life of the Hufflepuff wizard and take the Sword of Gryffindor.
11:55
Bo offers Chicken a hanky.
Chicken: Thanks I'll need this to clean up the blood.
Bo: What?
(Lights Out!)
APPLAUSE!
. . .and action!
We were in suspense throughout the entire movie
(even though we have both read all the books).
We laughed.
Bo cried.
It was tremendous!
A definite MUST SEE MOVIE!
As we left the theater the night sky was clear and the full moon lit the way to our car. It was then Bo noticed. .
Bo: Where did you get that sword?
Chicken: What sword?
Bo: The one you're holding? Chicken, did you take it from Hufflepuff guy?!?
Chicken: Me? No! Never!
Bo: Chicken. . .
Chicken: I swear I didn't do it by the Sword of Gryffindor!
Chicken: Darn it!
No comments:
Post a Comment